my kai-lui Anya...

my first ka-lui!

my dearest friend lailay...

i so happy for you...

thanks for bring her to the world!

love you!!

my kj bb chu

happy dinner out with my dearest kj : bbchu!

poor adria but happy sasa

when we return from guam...

their whole family got sick...

bj and bjf are fever...

adria got "hand foot mouth" diseases...

only sasa is well...

so bj decided to send her to me for the weekend...

look at her...

so happy!

coz i took her out for mango sweet...

let her play with iPhone...

guam day 4

my last dinner for this guam trip...

another buffet dinner by the sunset...

before dinner...

we had a walk on the beach...

a beautiful view...

i took this nice picture of adria...

she is 9 yrs old now...

can't believe this...

time flies...

my two little sweetheart...

ee loves you both...

my dearest family...

i love you all...

thanks for the endless love...

guam day 3

after this lunch... we will start the round island trip...

how come they are always so sweet...

both of them are pretty girls...

guam day 2

the girls family are having fun at the beach...

me and mom are having coffee at the cafe...

this is always my best time in guam...

this is always the best view in guam (in my eyes)...

adria is a big girl now...

sexy pose...

both of them are having real fun...

guam day 1

after the whole day sleep for me...

i am totally recharged...

yes... i slept from 9am to 6pm!

girls... let's go out for the dinner buffet!

i love making ice cream cones with the girls everytime we have buffet together!

guam boarding...arrival...

we are ready to go guam la!

this is adria's second visit...

and sasa's first visit...

guam here we come...

for me...

i haven't return home for a few years...

i think it was 3-4 years already...

honestly... i think i miss home...

(did i call guam home?!)

the sun is up...

and we are here...

good morning guam...

restart?

this week we start to talk via sms again...
these sms seems calm...
i'm not sure if this is real calm or not...

yes, i told him about the gift from above...
shit... yes i should not tell him... i told myself not to tell him...
why did i tell him...
i don't want him to think i do this for him or for us...
shit... i shouldn't have tell him...
cos i want things to move as the way it goes... not because of anything...

shit... i ruin everything again...
what's wrong with me...
i hate myself...

pls... pls... guide me and take me to where i belong...
pls... pls... give me the route and let me walk on it...
i don't want to think...
i don't want to plan...
i don't know what to do...

pressure from here... (dad mom)
pressure from there... (families)
pressure from inside... (myself)
pressure from outside... (work, life, money)
pressure pressure pressure everywhere....

2 good news in 2013

had dinner with my dear friend tonight... she is one of my best friend in life, as we share a lot of similarities:
* we are leo
* she is just 3 days older then me
* our ___ went to the same high school
* her ___ is just 4 days older then my ___
* we love softhard
* we love concerts
* we are "moog bite bite"
* we have "crocodile head" but is a "dump sheep" inside

* 2012 new years eve, a good news from her to become "mrs___"
* today, another good news from her to become "a mother"

i feel so happy for her...
she is my best friend, she is happy, i am happy too!

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deep inside me...
i'm very upset for myself...
what am i doing now...
what happened to me...
all these triggered my nerves...

dad mom in town

my dearest dad mom are in town!! hurray!! i miss them very much for the past few months (mom as in town in aug, dad was in town in may)...

so many things happened to me for the past years (especially last year), they are my backbone... without them i am sure i am gone already...

dad mom... i love you!!

happy birthday

happy birthday to my dearest friend on her xx-th birthday!! i wish you happy and healthy forever and ever!!